Everlasting God

It's been over 7 years since we lost our sweet baby, but he has been on my mind so much lately for some reason.  I say he, but really I don't know.  But I've always felt like it was a boy.  I knew Brooks was a boy.  I knew Presley was a girl.  And in my heart, I know our baby was a boy.  We named him Brady. 

I look at Presley, and I know that if Brady was here, she would not be.  Presley brings such immense joy to our lives.  I wouldn't trade her for one single second.  She completes our family.

But that doesn't erase that sweet baby we lost, and the deep sadness I feel when I think about him, when I think about that sad, dark time.  I can still feel the deep sorrow that surrounded me in the days following the loss.

It was not very long before I found out that I was pregnant with our sweet girl.  Because of our recent loss, the doctor wanted me to go in to make sure that everything was okay.  I remember being terrified on the way to Sioux Falls.  What if this was another ectopic pregnancy?  What if I was about to experience another deep heartache?

7 years later, and I still remember this song came on the radio as we drove to town.  I heard it the other day, after not hearing it for a long time.  And though it made me sad to remember that pain, to reopen that wound, it made me smile to think of the hope that we have in the Lord. 

Everlasting God

Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord

We will wait upon the Lord

We will wait upon the Lord

Our God, You reign forever

Our hope, our Strong Deliverer

You are the everlasting God

The everlasting God

You do not faint

You won't grow weary

You're the defender of the weak

You comfort those in need

You lift us up on wings like eagles